Let's get after it. Open your bibles to the book of James. As Jordan said, we're starting in chapter four today, and we got a really good question right off the bat that we want to get to. James poses a really helpful question. I want to give you some context before we get into that. If you remember last week, there was this contrast between earthly wisdom and wisdom from above. Remember that? Okay? It's there. Trust me. And a trait of wisdom from above is that it makes peace. Like, when you see wisdom from above, you see it lived out in peace among people. And then he starts into chapter four, kind of carrying that thought with, I don't want to call him passive aggressive, but it seems very tactful of, like, I don't think you have this wisdom from above. I think you're dumb. I think you have this earthly wisdom that I don't see peace within you. And the question that he poses to them right off the bat is, what causes quarrels and what causes fights among you? So this peace that comes from heavenly wisdom, I don't think you got it because there's so many fights and quarreling happening among you. But he says, well, what causes that? It's like, that's an excellent question. What's underneath the reason that we fight and we quarrel? What is behind that conflict? And that is a great question that we should ask. And it's a great question that perhaps a lot of us are getting wrong, like, really knowing the source of our conflict that we're having. And here's what's true for everybody in this room. No matter where you're at in your faith journey, if you're here for the first time because a friend invited you or you've been a follower of Jesus for decades, here's what's true for all of us. We all deal with conflict. Amen. Right? Like when Jordan asked in that announcement how many people think people are difficult, you're like, yeah, you're one of those people. Conflict is something that we all deal with. Some of you are like, yes. On the way here, in fact, we're still awkwardly sitting next to each other. Like, this conversation is going to continue on the way home. But we're trying to behave at church, right? You have conflict. You face it. And not just us personally. We see it all around us, countries, politicians, businesses, in the work world. Like, conflict is a part of life. And James is saying, okay, well, what's causing that? And before we get into that, I wanted to be clear. Not all conflict is bad. In fact, Jesus said in Matthew 1034, don't think that I've come to bring peace, but the sword I'm going to cause. Man against father, daughter against mother. Like following Jesus brings about conflict. Jesus had a lot of conflict. Much of his ministry was intention with the religious leaders. Paul had a lot of conflict. He got chased out of town several times. Sometimes following Jesus in a world in rebellion against God will get you into conflict. So not all conflict is bad, but that's not what James is talking about. He says, what causes conflict among you and the you is plural. It's y'all, like, all of you. What's causing conflict among y'all? Church people. Like, in church. How come you church people, you christians, are at each other? How come you don't get along? What's behind the tension in your relationships? You're saying, this isn't right. Why is that? And you're like, that's not a hard question. I know what causes conflict. He's an idiot, right? She's a gossip. He stole, they lied. Like, they mistreated me. That's caused the conflict. I know what causes conflict? Other people. But that's not the answer that James gives. He wants to get a little deeper and look behind or underneath this conflict. It's like, I think there's something helpful for us to learn and see. And before we go further, I just want to say, pastor early, I know whatever conflict you've gone through, that you're in or that you will have, tends to be very emotional. It stirs up anger, hurt. And when you want to kind of examine it, a guard can go up of like, don't go there. You don't know what they said. You don't know what they did. You don't know how they hurt me. And I don't want to undermine those real feelings where maybe you've been sinned against. But if we could kind of approach this with a posture of humility, of, like, even still, is there something for us to learn if we take a closer look at the conflict that we deal with? Sound good? All right, let's read all of verse one. He says, what causes quarrels and what causes fights among you? Is it not this that your passions are at war within you? He's like, I know what causes quarrels and fights. You. You're the problem. Now, how can he say that? He didn't even know the issues. He didn't even know the issues. At least he's not addressing the issues, but he just says quarrels and fights. Well, that's pretty general, right? Quarrels and fights. Pretty general. He doesn't get into them. Like, how can you know what causes these specific quarrels and fights if you don't address these specific quarrels and fights? If you can't say, like, well, I know what caused the beef between you two. It's because he stole something. And I know what caused the beef between you two because she lied. And I know what caused the conflict and quarreling here because he mistreated you. He doesn't get into any of those because he's saying, like, okay, I'm not interested in knowing who's right and wrong on this issue or that issue. I want to get deeper than that, and I want to say what's behind quarreling and fighting? Why are we doing that? Why did he lash out in anger? Because you said that. Why did she give him the silent treatment for three days over that? Why do they not get along? Because they disagree on this issue. Like, what's behind that? Why when you come to a church, can people say, like, well, these two people never really sit by each other, and let's make sure that these two people don't serve together. And how come these people won't talk to like, that's kind of messed up. And James is saying, why is that so among christians, among you? Like, I get it in the world, but why does that exist in the Church? James is like, I know you. He doesn't say you. He says your passions, like, passions inside of you. Let me illustrate this. Paul Tripp has given this illustration. We put some of his books in the resource center. If you ever have a chance, I'd encourage you to pick one up. But think of it like this. Oh, it's just water. Everyone's okay. Panic. Clean up on aisle four. I'm probably going to fall sometimes. I'm going to slip a bottle. Now, if I asked, why'd water come out of the bottle? You're going to be like, because you shook it. Right? But what if I kind of emphasize the different word in that question? Why did water come out of that bottle? Because water was in the bottle, right? Water was in the bottle. That's why it came out. Me shaking it just revealed what was in the bottle. I didn't say, like, why didn't orange juice come out of it? Right? Because water was in it. Or maybe you've heard this saying, there is nothing that comes out of a drunk's mouth that wasn't already in his heart when he was sober. Like, the liquor just loosened lips. Like, just kind of greased the skids from the heart out the mouth. Like when that person cut you off in traffic, they didn't make you angry. They revealed anger that already lived in you. Like, when they misspoke or lied about you, they didn't make you kind of vengeful. They just kind of revealed some vengefulness that's in you, right? When your neighbor got that new car, he didn't make you jealous. He just kind of revealed some covetousness that's already lived in you. Listen, you are never going to gain ground in our relational conflict issues if you always assume that the issue is outside of you and not in you. If it's always, they did this and they do that, and you never have anything to learn about your own heart, and you never look, and it's like, but why am I so angry about that? I mean, there's a lot of things that have happened. That one made me angry. Why? There's a lot of things people have that I don't have. But when they got it, that made me jealous. Why? What are those emotions saying? And, guys, relationships are hard and challenging, but they're also such a gift from God because they're part of our sanctification, they're part of our refining. They reveal things in us. You think you're a sinner, then you get married, then you know how selfish you are, right? Then you have kids, and then you realize how selfish you are. Some of relationship and christian community expose the sin in us. Community is hard. It's important. It's biblical, it shapes us. But it's hard. And often because it's hard, whenever it gets hard, we just run. I'll go somewhere else. I'll hang out with different people. I'll attend a different church. I'll just kind of bolt. And when every time we run away from community, we're running away from our own development, our own growth. But he's saying, hey, you got some fighting and some quarreling going on among you, and I want you to grow from it. And in order to grow from it, we need to look not at each other, but inside our own hearts, because he says there's a problem. The problem deals with you, or particularly your passions. Your passions. That word for passions is the word that we get our word, hedonism from. So he's talking about like a self indulgence, pleasure seeking, self gratification. It might better read, is it not this, that your selfish passions are at war? There's kind of a self centeredness behind this. And this word only gets used, I think, three or four times in the whole New Testament. But here's a few examples of them. This is Luke 814. As far as what fell among the thorns, they are those who hear, but as they go on their way, they are choked by the cares, riches, and pleasures of life, and their fruit does not mature. So that if you guys may recognize, this is from a parable that Jesus told about scattering seed. It's the word of God and how different people respond to it. He's saying, I know why the word of God is not producing fruit in some of your life pleasures that you're just seeking kind of self centered pleasures. Here's another place that word gets used. Titus, three. Three. For we ourselves were once foolish, disobedient, led astray, slaves to various passions and pleasures, passing our days in malice and envy, hated by others and hating one another. Those aren't positive examples. So when James used this word, it's this idea of kind of self centeredness. And James is saying that these selfish passions are at war within you. Basically, there is a war among you, and it's pointing to a war in you. There's fighting and quarreling going on among you, and it's pointing to an inner fight happening within you. It's a window into your heart. Now, it's not news that people have a lot of internal conflict. We have that internal wrestling. Anybody going to say, like, yeah, I got some internal conflict. Six of us are great. The rest of you are, just tune me out. You're doing great. But all of us are born with a conscience by the grace of God. Like, we have this kind of moral compass of, like, I don't need anybody tell me. I just kind of know that this is wrong. And we're also born with desires. And sometimes our conscience and our desires are opposed to each other. You may relate to that. Like, I know it's wrong, and I want to do it right. I know I probably shouldn't. I still want to do it. And there's this war within you internally, and the secular way to kind of deal with that war, because we don't like war, we don't like conflict. And that's going on is like, okay, well, we need to kind of quiet the voice of our conscience and boister the voice of our desires. And you hear that in phrase, like, follow your heart, trust your gut, right? If you want to do it, how bad can it be? Like, you wouldn't steer you wrong. That's kind of a secular way to kind of deal with that conflict, a religious way to deal with that conflict. Or is saying, hey, our heart is deceitful. Lean not on your own understanding, but in all your ways acknowledge him. So we actually need outside help, like we could deceive ourselves. So let's give more voice to a conscience than just our desires. And when you're a Christian, it's not just your conscience. You have the holy spirit that doesn't just kind of help you with right or wrong, but opens your eyes to the beauty of God. And we have this eternal conflict. In fact, the Bible speaks of this eternal conflict. Here's some passages that do that. One. Peter 211. Beloved, I urge you as sojourners and exiles, to abstain from the passions of the flesh which wage war against your soul. There are some things that you want to do that aren't good for you, and there is internal conflict about that. Here's another passage. For I delight in the law of God in my inner being, but I see in my members another law waging war against the law of my mind and making me captive to the law of sin that dwells in my members. So there's a part of me that wants to do good and wants to follow God, and there's a part of me that doesn't. And there's a war and internal struggle. Here's one more. Galatians 517. For the desires of the flesh are against the spirit, and the desires of the spirit are against the flesh, for these are opposed to each other to keep you from doing the things you want to do. There is internal conflict going on. And James is addressing this. He's saying, here's the war. The war is I want it to do what I want to do, and I want to live how I want to live, and I want to spend my money how I want to spend my money, and I want to do what I want to do. And I want to say what's right, what I think is right, and I want to self determine all that. And yet I wasn't made for me, and I was made for God to be in relationship with him and to honor and please him in all of my life. Hence the eternal conflict. And it gets messy when you try to fulfill your desires apart from God. Let's look at what he says in verse two. He says, you desire and you do not have. So you murder, you covet or hotly desire and you cannot obtain, so you fight and quarrel. Now notice how the internal becomes external. Didn't it just start with a desire? But then that desire didn't get met, so you kind of lash out. Lash out in anger. You lash out in conflicts. You lash out in fighting. You lash out in quarreling. Like, it started internally, but it got external. And we kind of go full circle in two and a half verses here, because the question he started out asking in verse one was, hey, what's behind all these fighting and quarreling that's happening? And then here in the middle of two, he gets back to fighting and quarreling. So it starts with fighting and quarreling. He kind of circles back to fighting and quarreling. And you see kind of the ride or how you get there. It's like you have selfish passions and they can't be satisfied, or they don't get satisfied. So it leads to frustration. It leads to fighting and quarreling. That's the ride you're on. You have selfish passions. You want the world to satisfy them. The world doesn't satisfy them. You grow in frustration, which spills out into your relationships with fighting and quarreling. Now, notice he doesn't say that you have evil desires, though. Like, look at verse two. He doesn't say you desire evil things and you do not have. So you murder. The focus here isn't so much on good versus evil, though, in the context that gets flushed out, because even the section before, they see something like, you have earthly wisdom, but that's demonic. There's things underneath that. But we tend to think of good and evil and right and wrong, of just immoral, moral. Like, we kind of reduce it down to do's and don'ts. And he's like, no, it's much more relational. It's much more intimate than that. The heart behind this is not right or wrong, good or evil. It's you first versus God first. That's the heart of sin. It's you first versus God first. What's the highest desire? What's the driving desire in your life? Is it to please you? Is it to please God? The word that gets used for desire is epithemia or epithemio. And sometimes it gets translated lust, which is fitting. It's like this really strong, passionate desire. But when we think of lust, we just tend to think of sexual desires. You can lust for more than that. Like, you can crave, be greedy, like want things. And the word epa, themio is two words, epe, which is a preposition, like in or on. And thumos means like anger, frustration, heat. Not frustration, like fierceness, heat, passion. So you put those together. It's like he is in heat. She is on anger. Like, it's this epi desire. It's this really strong kind of craving, this passionate desire. And desire can be good things. Like, it's a good desire to I want to get married. It's a good desire to want to have kids, raise a family. It's a good desire to want to get a good job and provide for your family. It's a good desire to want to have tight community, close friends. But good desires become bad desires when they become ultimate desires, when they become epi desires, or when they become ruling desires. And the difference is between saying I want and I need. It's okay to say, I want to get married, I want to have kids, I want to get a good job, I want to make a decent income. I want to have close friends. Those are all good desires. But when the shift goes, like, I need a spouse, I need kids, I don't know who I am if I don't have kids. I need this kind of job that validates me as a person. I need you to affirm me. I need friends that always affirm and support me. I need that. And it becomes this epi desire, this driving desire. Let's just be honest. We use the word need way too loosely. Have you guys watched hdtv? And they're, like, touring a new house, and they're like, oh, well, we'll need new cabinets right away. Really? Like, you need new cabinets because they look fine. We need them. Or maybe you've heard somebody say, like, oh, I need a phone, mom. You do? I mean, I could see how you'd want a phone. I see how all your friends have a phone. And I could see how a phone could be helpful in certain situations, but need. Let's back the truck up. Like, you need Jesus. You need probably shut your mouth right now, too, right? You need Jesus, you need air, and you need some food and shelter. Probably in that order, right? But we just use this need way too loosely. We slip into this thing, like, I need this. I need this to feel important. I need this to feel validated. I need this to feel successful. I need this to feel supported. I need this to feel loved. And James is saying that is behind your conflict. You need this. I need you to affirm me. I need you to validate me. I just need this. And you don't get it. It spills out in your relationships. You're this discontented person that's fighting and quarreling. You're unsatisfied, he says, and then you murder. Now, I don't think James literally means murder. If you give a later date to the book, there were some things some zealots were doing, like maybe, but I think there's an earlier date to James, and he's often taking from Jesus'teaching, on the sermon on the mount. And when he talked about, hey, if you're angry in your heart, you commit murder in your heart, James is saying, hey, your quarrels and your fights, like, there's some really bad heart stuff going on when you give in to these selfish passions and desires. So that's a big deal. And James is about to pivot in this text. He's going to continue to diagnose the problem, but he's going to do it in a way that points to the solution. Look at how he finishes verse two. You do not have because you do not ask. Oh, wish you would have led with that one. Right? Sounds simple. God, give me a spouse, give me kids, give me the job. Is that how I do it? I don't have because I don't ask? Problem solved. I'll start asking. And there's other people in this room that's, like, not true because I've been asking for a long time and I don't got it. So what is James getting at here? There's an emphasis in the Greek of the word ask. So it could read like you don't really ask. Like, you ask, but you don't really ask. Okay, what does it mean to really ask? Do I got to shout? I got full my hands like this? They could get on my knees. What does it mean to really ask? Now, the challenge is, I know we're just looking at three verses at the beginning of chapter four, and it's literally been months ago before we were in chapter one. So we can tend to just kind of isolate this, but we've got to understand, when they would get this letter, they wouldn't read three verses at a time. They would read the whole letter. And there is an ongoing argument and point that James is making that is connected to one another. And when we just read three verses at a time, we can get into it more, but we might disconnect them from other points that James is making. And he's building on something here right before this. He's talking about earthly wisdom versus heavenly wisdom, and heavenly wisdom brings peace. And then he's like, and you all ain't got it. You're bickering, you're quarreling, you're fighting, you're missing out on this heavenly wisdom. Okay, so what's the argument that James has been building on. Like, if you go back on those verses, he says, who is wise and understanding among you by his good conduct? Let him show his works in the meekness of wisdom. Okay, the meekness of wisdom. Like, we've heard that word before. Where did he use that? You flipped the page right over in chapter one. He's saying, therefore, put away all filthiness and rampant wickedness and receive with meekness the implanted word which is able to save your soul. You don't have this wisdom that comes from the word of God that leads to peace among you because you're not receiving the word of God. You're after your own passions. You don't have this. Okay, well, how do I get this wisdom? Well, go back to verse five of chapter one. Says, anyone who lacks wisdom, let him ask God who gives it graciously to all without reproach, and it will be given to him. Okay, well, this is an argument that's being built on itself. It's like if you want wisdom, you need to ask for it. You need to seek and receive God's word, which you get it from. And when you have it, you will see it in your life and you will see it in your relationships. I'm not seeing it in your relationships. Therefore, some conclusions. Are you not receiving the word of God? Are you not really asking? Now, when we hear ask, we tend to think of, like, just making a request. But based on the context, James is talking about more than just making a request, he's talking about seeking God, receiving his word. In fact, in verse two, ask is a present tense, which means like, it's continual action, like a continual asking. So James is saying is, you don't have. We'll come back to that. You don't have because you're not really seeking God. You're not really, like continually devoted asking, seeking God, like, that's what's missing in your life. And he goes on in verse three to say this. You ask and do not receive because you ask wrongly to spend it on your passions. What do you mean you ask wrongly? Did I pray wrong? Did I forget to say amen? Am I supposed to say in Jesus name? That'll do it. Now I just got to do it and say in Jesus name. And then I get, no, no. Here's how you're asking wrongly. It's still about you. It's still about your selfish passions that you're chasing up. You're not seeking God. You're seeking blessing. You're not seeking God. You're seeking things from God. And it's self centered. It's your selfish passions. And notice how many times that word ask comes up. You do not have because you do not ask. You ask, and you do not receive because you ask wrongly. It's like all this asking. It's like, okay, not too long ago, when did James also talk about asking? Well, you go back to chapter one, verse five. So if any of you lacks wisdom, let him. What? Ask. Ask God, who gives generously to all without reproach, and it will be given to him. But let him ask in faith with no doubting. For the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea that is driven and tossed by the wind. For that person must not suppose that he will receive anything from the Lord. Okay, so now we're back to the same idea of I'm asking for things and I'm not getting it. What's behind that? And James is like, well, it's doubt. It's doubt. Now you hear doubt and you think, like, I believe he's going to, maybe he won't kind of doubt. But doubt here is referring to like a division within the believer or a lack of consistency in its faith. And I think that's made clear in verse eight. If you keep reading, he says, for the person who must not suppose that he will receive anything from the Lord, he is a double minded man, unstable in his ways. That's your issue. This is the issue of doubt. You're a double minded man. The division is not. I believe God will, I don't know. Will he like kind of doubt. It's not the doubt that you think of when the dad of that son needed Jesus to heal him. And Jesus says, all things are possible for those who believe. And the dad's like, I believe, help my unbelief. I want to believe. It's hard to believe, but I'm here. I want to believe. It's not that kind of doubt. The doubt that James is talking about is this double mindedness, this division of like, I want God. I want to follow God, I want the grace of God, I want the forgiveness of God, I want the mercy of God, I want all that I do. And I want to sleep with my girlfriend, and I want to live my life how I want to live my life. And I want to determine what's right or wrong. I want both. And James is saying, that's your problem. It doesn't work that way. You have a double mind. You're divided in your passions. And this section, these verses are in a section on worldliness. Like, next week, you'll hear verses where it's like, hey, friendship with the world is an enemy with God. You don't get both. You're this double minded person. You're divided in what you want. You want some of God, but you also want to still be the ruler of your life and make your own decisions and do what you want to do. And it does not work that way. In fact, in the very next, in the beginning of verse four, he says, you adulterous people. I'm sure he said it really nice, though, right? You adulterous people. That's your problem. That's how he describes their problem, adultery. You're like, no, the problem is relational conflict. I know you think that, but underneath that problem is adultery. Now, guys, adultery is not sleeping around. That's sexual immorality. Adultery is being married and sleeping around. That's adultery. Adultery is like, I made a covenant to you. I made promises to you. I'm a committed to you, and I want to go fulfill my desires with other people as well. And God is saying, no, you're mine. I made you, I bought you, I redeemed you, I adopted you. To my family, we're in covenant together. And you're sleeping around with the world. You're trying to let the world fulfill your passions. You think the world can satisfy you? I'm supposed to be satisfying you. I'm your husband. And the best description he gives is like, you adulterous people, and it's messing everything up. It's messing everything up. Like, you can see your adultery in your relationships. You think it's just like, no, we got conflict because of this. Like, no, you got conflict because of this. And adultery. There's something adulterous underneath and behind your conflict. And it's messing everything up because that's what adultery does. Like, you think you're chasing a desire and a pleasure that will be satisfied, and once you do, you find that it's not. And you just made a mess of everything because when you commit adultery, you wreck intimacy with your spouse because you broke a covenant and you have secrets and you're lying. But also, you don't have this open covenant relationship with your mistress. Both are messed up. You just wrecked it. And what James is saying, or put it, he's like, guess what? You desire and you do not have or it doesn't fulfill you. You chased after a passion and you found the mess that it gave you. Or John McMurray said it this way. The best cure for hedonism is an attempt to practice it. Now, I don't recommend it, but it's true. You think that that job with that corner office is going to validate you as a person. Boy, I hope you get it. I hope you get that job with that corner office, and then you will find how it doesn't deliver. You think if you could drive that car or you get that spouse or you get in that magazine or whatever it may be, you think that's going to make you feel like a value person? I hope you get it. Because once you get it, you're going to feel or experience and discover how empty it is and how it doesn't deliver. There's a famous quote by C. S. Lewis. I don't remember the full quote, but the gist of it is we make like, mud pine the slums because we don't know what's offered to us at a holiday at the sea. And he critiques our desires. It's not that your desires are too strong, it's that they're too weak. Like we settle for lesser things when something so greater is offered to us. You have desires and you think money is going to fulfill those. Oh, you think another human being is going to fulfill those? You're settling. You got desires and cravings that only God can satisfy and notice. Here's a good turn here. James goes from talking about unmet desires to the path to met desires. Verse two. He says, you desire and you do not have. So you murder, you covet and you cannot obtain. So you fight and quarrel. You do not have because you do not ask. Here's the reason you don't have, and here's the way to get it. It comes down to asking or seeking. And you're like, well, you don't have what? Don't have the car, don't have the job, don't have the status. He doesn't say because that's what he's talking about. He's talking about your desires. What you don't have are met desires. It's not about anything specific. It's about an unsatisfied heart. You're chasing all these things, and none of them satisfy. You don't find satisfaction, which is kind of the heart of, or the byproduct of sinfulness. We pointed this out in this passage before. This is Jeremiah, 213. For my people have committed two evils. I've read the Old Testament. I think they're more than two, right? But he's boiling this down. He says, this is what it comes down to. They have forsaken me the fountain of living water, evil number one. And hewed out cisterns for themselves. Broken cisterns that can hold no water. Evil number two. Here's what you're doing. You are denying the living God who can actually satisfy you. And you're digging wells that don't hold water which can't satisfy you. That's unfaithful and stupid, but that's what you're doing. That's like he's trying to point that out. You're turning your back on God who can satisfy you, and you're like, why? Got this Dixie cup with a hole in it, and I'm just going to drink for this forever. It's like that's kind of the essence of what you're doing. But here's an amazing psalm. Psalm 37 four. Delight yourself in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart. Now, that doesn't mean, boy, if I am a really good Christian, I'll get everything I want. What he's saying is, if you delight yourself in the Lord, he will satisfy you. He will give you contentment and peace in which only he can give. But you're not looking for him to that. You got your selfish pleasures and passions and desires and earthly wisdom, and you're chasing after earthly things to satisfy you, and it can't do it. So you're an unsatisfied person. You're a discontented person. And a discontented person makes a terrible spouse and a terrible friend and causes all kinds of relational conflict. James is saying your relationships are off because your desires are off. You don't have your selfish desires met because you're looking for the world to meet them, and the world cannot meet them. So you are unsatisfied, disconnected in person, and it shows in your relationships. Your relationships are off because your desires are off. Or another way to put it is you're not really seeking God. Not really. That's what James says. Not like this ongoing, persistent, passionate pursuit of God. You're divided. I'm not saying you don't want God. You just also love this world. You're an adulterer, like, you want some God and you want some world on the side, or you want some world and you want some God on the side. You think that's the heart of our problem. God is not your epidesire. He's not your epidesire. You want God, but you need that spouse. You want God, but you need that job. You want God, but you need that house like you want God, but you need these other things. And God is not your epidesire, but guys, God's the only one who can satisfy you. And that's the good news. God satisfies hearts. At his right hand are pleasures forevermore. Jesus says, abide in me like, I want to put my joy in you, that your joy is full. You're looking for satisfaction, fulfillment in wells that don't hold water while I'm a living fountain, a spring that never runs dry. God satisfies hearts. That would have been a great place for an amen. But this is where it gets practical. I mean, that's practical, but this is where it gets connected to our relationships. Being satisfied in God is a blessing in relationships. Being satisfied in God is a blessing in relationships when you know who you are in God, when you know what you have in God, when you're content in God, what a gift to your spouse, what a gift to your kids, what a gift to your friends. And you may think, I really got to work on my relationship with my spouse. I really got to work on my relationship with my coworkers, and I really got to work. And yes, you probably do. Relationships take work. But what if the best, most rewarding work you could do for that relationship is be someone who is satisfied in God? Like, I know who I am in Christ. I know what I have in Christ. I'm not needing it from you and you. And I don't need you to validate me and you to affirm me and you to make me feel special. I know who I am in Christ. What a gift to your relationships. A few weeks ago, when we were looking at taming the tongue, we said, treasure God to tame the tongue. Treasure God to tame the tongue. This isn't rocket science. And this is like James is continuing on with this argument. So here's what I want you to remember. Treasure God to strengthen your relationships. Treasure God to strengthen your relationship. You got to know the correlation between our relationship with God and our relationship with one another. Like, getting this right with God means everything to getting these right. When I know I'm loved, when I know I'm accepted, when I know I'm adopted into his family, when I know who I am there. I'm not needing it from everybody else. I'm not looking for you to validate me. I'm not putting that expectation of pressure on you like, I'm content in who I am in Christ. It makes all the difference in these relationships when we understand this one properly. So you may think you got a problem with your neighbor or your spouse or your parents or someone in this room. And I'm sure there's some real sin and hurt and conflict in that. But what if underneath that conflict is a deeper problem, is a heart problem that you have an epidesire that's not God? And are you looking for them to fulfill something or give you something that only God can give you? And behind that conflict with that other person is your adultery that you're craving from the world, what only God can give. But if we understand this relationship with our heavenly Father, it so changes and impacts these relationships with each other. And when stuff happens, because stuff will happen, what comes out of us won't be anger, jealousy, insecurity. What comes out of us will be love, patience, kindness and gentleness. And when conflict happens, it won't be devastating. Like, how could they do that? How could they do this to me? How could this ever happen? And you just want to kind of break the relationship apart. It won't, won't be devastating. It'll be an opportunity for ministry, because God is your epidesire. And in that moment you can please and serve him, and you can show grace, and you can show patience, and you can show contentment, you can show peace. Guys, our hope for you as a church, for all of us, for me, is that God would be our epi desire, our highest desire, to honor him, to serve him, to please him. And we would find our satisfaction in him, that we would know who we are in him, we would know what we have in him. And our relationships with each other would be blessed because of that. As Jesus died, he was beaten, flogged, and hung on a cross to repair this relationship between us and God, to redeem us back to God. And getting that right makes everything in getting this right, when you know I'm loved by God, when you know I have a future with God, when you know that someday he will wipe every tear from your eye, when you know that you are a fellow heir with Christ, you're not looking for other people in this world to satisfy you in a way that only God can. When Paul calls us to celebrate the Lord's supper, which we're going to do in a bit here, he connects it to our relationships with each other as well. In one corinthians eleven, and we've told you this every week, don't take this lightly. Don't just go through the motions, but giving instructions to a church on communion. In one corinthians eleven, Paul says, hey, before you do this, you ought to examine yourself. You need to look into your own heart. Where do you see selfish desires and passions? Where do you see spiritual adultery? Where you're looking for other people or this world to give you what only God can give you. He goes on to say that before you take communion, you should discern the body. The body doesn't just mean your body, but the body. Like the group, the church. Are there people that you're withholding forgiveness from? Are there people that you're just so angry with? Are there people that you're just so full of jealousy? Not. That's not fitting. In fact, Christ said, people will know you're my disciples by the way you love one another. That's hard because people are hard. People sin and you're hard. You sin and it's messy. How in the world are we supposed to get along? Well, every time we come to remember the cross of Jesus Christ, that is the key to our relationships with each other. Because every time we come and reminded of the sacrifice of Jesus Christ, we're also reminded, like, oh, I'm no better than that person. I'm no better than that person. I'm a sinner in need of saving. I need forgiving. Why would I withhold forgiveness from somebody else? Or, I have belonging in Jesus Christ. I have a heavenly inheritance. Why am I needing this from them? Why do I fight so much to get their affirmation and their approval? I have all that I need in Christ Jesus. And we're reminded of that every time we celebrate communion. So when we celebrate communion, don't just rush to do it and go through the motions. Examine yourself. Discern the body. And I hope, and I pray that our relationships are blessed because of our confidence in what Christ has accomplished before us. Amen. All right, let's pray. Father, I pray that you would help us to look in our hearts to see our own adultery where we've gone to the world or other people to get what only you can give us. I pray that we would look at our relationships to people that we're disgusted by anger with withholding forgiveness, jealous of. And then I hope we look up and we see that while we were yet sinners, you sent your son to die us. And in that humility and in that grace, would it be so real in our own hearts who we are and what we have in you that it would show in our relationships? Pray this in your name. Amen.